The BEST of Nonviolent Communication - 10 Key skills in 20 min

0:14 1. How "deserve" is ruining communication

2:30 2. Responsibility for your emotions

4:22 3. Intrinsic motivation instead of punishments and rewards

5:45 4. The goal is the relationship, not always getting what you want

6:26 5. Non-violent Communication formula: observation, feeling, need, request

8:38 6. Problems with taking too much responsiblity.
Conscequences: fear of intimacy, shaming others, making others weak and dependent on you or pushing them away... Why we are more open with strangers.

COMMON MISTAKES:
11:30 7.
- confusing need and request
- request stated too vaguely

12:20 8.
- skipping fact, feelings, need and jumping straight into request

12:58 9.
- saying only what you don't want instead of what you do want

13:24 10.
- using hints, questions instead of direct request

14:16 Talk about yourself, not anyone else when requesting

15:12 11. The relationship and communication with ourselves. Self-shaming, motivation and empathy towards yourself

17:12 Our relationship with ourselves and others are the same, the two systems enrich and support each other.

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