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The difference between accountability and an apology during a breakup. I tend to think that accountability such as whether it's through a letter, through a phone call, through however we better express it is exactly the path that we need to take. Why is that? Accountability really is your willingness to accept responsibility and it's not only that you respect your accepting your responsibility, it's that you're going to change regardless, whether you know they agree with your accountability, with the excuses that you might be giving, with just the fact that you are assuming the responsibility of certain issues. So you are already determined to make the necessary changes.
The difference between success and failure really is when you immerse yourself in solution mode and accountability offers you that component because you enter into a dialogue once again whether it's through our a handwritten letter through any type of communication and you clean up your side of the street. And you show them that you are 100% willing to change not because of them but because of you. You've realized that that was erroneous. It's not something that leads to a relationship with that you that you want to build on so I think it's very very important that you decide to take the accountability route. I think the accountability path is is so much better. Once again it puts you in a solution mode. People like to hear solutions to problems.
When we compare it to the apology, an apology most of the time implies that you take full responsibility but you're not offering a solution and not only that, is that you take the responsibility but in return you're asking for forgiveness and sometimes people are not ready to forgive. So your way of looking at the issues at hand are really dependent on whether you are forgiven or not. The accountability is contingent upon if you're forgiven. Expressing regret with no positive changes is pointless.
As we decide to look at what really happened in our relationship, once the appropriate time has passed, an accountability of sorts is certainly a strategy and a step to look at to be able to communicate with our ex. I think that one of the best approaches to really understanding the importance of an accountability versus an apology, put your place in the side of receiving it.
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